The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis

The Problem of Pain by C.S. Lewis
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The basic premise of the book makes sense - pain has many positive purposes. He focuses on the religious and spiritual purposes and ignores, for example, the clear evolutionary purpose of pain. Additionally, many of his side points have a very weak premise that Lewis takes for granted and therefore the overall argument fails. Worth reading if you're Christian or borderline. It would probably be a waste of time for nonbelievers or agnostics.

Finally, in my opinion, Lewis skips the most troubling kind of pain- the pain sick children suffer. That's a pretty big oversight.

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Beyond This Horizon by Robert A. Heinlein

Beyond This Horizon by Robert A. Heinlein
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

This reads like a draft by an exceptionally interesting though potentially dangerous teenage boy.

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Catch and Kill by Ronan Farrow

Catch and Kill: Lies, Spies, and a Conspiracy to Protect Predators by Ronan Farrow
My rating: 5 of 5 stars

I didn’t think I was interested in this book because I figured I knew the basics about the #metoo movement but this book blew my mind. It’s All the President’s Men + Bad Blood + pick your favorite true-crime thriller.

I honestly think I need to reread this because it covers so many important topics. 1) The importance of ethical and dedicated journalism, 2) the power and often evil of the good-old-boys network, 3) the inequality of a justice system that allows for SLAPP suits and countersuits to burden people with the cost of a legal defense until they abandon their claims, 4) the deep shadiness of Non-Disclosure Agreements and the general harm they cause to our society, 5) how impossible it is to get people to believe women were sexually assaulted even when EVERYONE KNOWS they were sexually assaulted.

Also, I didn't think it was possible for me to hate Matt Lauer more than I already did, but, yeah, it's possible.

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An American Marriage by Tayari Jones

An American Marriage by Tayari Jones
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This was very good and I definitely recommend it. It just sort of missed being one of my favorites this year because it lacked a little something. While I really became invested in Roy and all of Roy's parents, Celeste and her entire family lacked the same kind of depth. Andre was a decent enough character but I just didn't feel his significant connection to Celeste. Maybe I just didn't believe enough in Celeste as a character to believe in her relationships generally.

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Life Undercover by Amaryllis Fox

Life Undercover: Coming of Age in the CIA by Amaryllis Fox
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

There is some stuff, particularly when she is in high school, that is difficult to wrap my mind around. But overall a very interesting book that inspires a lot of thought about what our foreign policy and how much we ask of our intelligence agency public servants.

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The Sailor Who Fell from Grace with the Sea by Yukio Mishima

The Sailor Who Fell from Grace with the Sea by Yukio Mishima
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The writing is 5-star writing, but to me, the message of the book is 1-star. Noboru espouses a very non-Judeo-Christian view of the world, and while I am a student of languages, cultures, and foreign relations, a world view that privileges Greek and Roman-style daring and machismo above basic Golden Rule-type goodness -- is precisely the reason that I have become philosophically Christian. To my mind, the sailor Ryuji Tsukazaki is an admirable man. But to Noboru, and indeed likely to the author Yukio Mishima, he is soft and romantic and deserves what he gets. What a horror. Add to that the book's little dash of misogyny, like a cherry on top of the murder sundae.

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Extra Lives by Tom Bissell

Extra Lives: Why Video Games Matter by Tom Bissell
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

Tom Bissell is an excellent writer, and I found myself riveted by all but the 5th chapter and the appendix, despite never having played the games he is discussing. Sadly he fails to draw any deep philosophical conclusions about the act of playing video games. He was very close to doing so but failed to give us an important conclusion or conclusions to wrap our mind around. Maybe he feels that's as unnecessary as justifying making or consuming art of any kind, but it seems like a cop-out.

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I Think You're Wrong (But I'm Listening) by Sarah Stewart Holland

I Think You're Wrong (But I'm Listening): A Guide to Grace-Filled Political Conversations by Sarah Stewart Holland
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Somewhat interesting, but not terribly deep. Worth considering some of the cooperative spirit discussed in this book and I'm interested in listening to the podcast, "Pantsuit Politics." I recommend "The Righteous Mind" by Jonathan Haidt which is also about understanding the other side of the political aisle but with scientific research.

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All We Ever Wanted by Emily Giffin

All We Ever Wanted by Emily Giffin
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This isn't literary, but it's very readable and topical and does it engage the reader to think about parenting, and what it means and requires.

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Political Reading 2019

In honor of tomorrow's Democratic primary debate, here's some of what I've been reading.

The 7 Democratic Candidates in the December Debate, By Polling*:

1) Joe Biden, 76, Vice President, former Senator from Delaware, read Promises to Keep (also wrote Promise Me, Dad)

2) Bernie Sanders, 77, US Senator from Vermont, read 1) Bernie Sanders Guide to Political Revolution, 2) Our Revolution (also wrote a million more books)
2) Elizabeth Warren, 69, US Senator from Massachusetts, read 1) This Fight is Our Fight, 2) A Fighting Chance, 3) All Your Worth

4) Pete Buttigieg, 37, Mayor of South Bend Indiana, read Shortest Way Home

5) Andrew Yang, 44, founder for Venture for America, read The War on Normal People
6) Amy Klobuchar, 58, US Senator from Minnesota, read The Senator Next Door
7) Tom Steyer, 62, Billionaire former hedge fund executive, not in the debates, (he doesn't have a book, he only wrote the foreword in Drawdown)

Remaining 9 Candidates by Alphabetical Order:
Michael Bennet, 54, US Senator from Colorado, read The Land of Flickering Lights
* Michael Bloomberg, 77, former Mayor of New York City, Billionaire media executive (Climate of Hope) (joined race Nov. 24)
Cory Booker, 50, US Senator from New Jersey, read United
Julian Castro, 44, Cabinet Member, HUD, Mayor of San Antonio, read An Unlikely Journey
John Delaney, 56, Congressman, Maryland 6th District, no book?
Tulsi Gabbard, 38, Congresswomen Hawaii 2nd District, (book coming in 2021, Is Today the Day?)
*Deval Patrick, 63, former Governor of Massachusetts  (joined race Nov. 14)
Joe Sestak, 67, former Congressman, not in debates, (Walking in Your Shoes to Restore the American Dream)
Marianne Williamson, 66, founder of Project Angel Food and author, lots of books I won’t read

Dropped out:
Bill de Blasio, 58, Mayor of NYC, no book
Steve Bullock, 53, Governor of Montana, (My Name Is Steve Delano Bullock)
Kirsten Gillibrand, 52, Senator from New York, read Off the Sidelines
Mike Gravel, 89, Senator from Alaska (38 years ago), not in the debates, (two books I won't read)
Kamala Harris, 54, US Senator from California, read The Truths We Hold (also wrote Smart on Crime)
John Hickenlooper, 67, Governor of Colorado, read The Opposite of Woe
Jay Inslee, 68, Governor of Washington, (Apollo’s Fire)
Wayne Messam, 44, Mayor of Miramar, Fl, not in debates, no book
Seth Moulton, 40, Congressman from Massachusetts 6th District, not in debates, (Called to Serve)
Beto O’Rourke, 46, Congressman from Texas 16th District, (Dealing Death and Drugs)
Richard Ojeda, 48, former West Virginia state senator
Tim Ryan, 45, Congressman from 16th district, (A Mindful Nation)
Eric Swalwell, 38, House representative from California's 15th

Republicans:
Donald Trump, 73, current President
Joe Walsh, 57, former Congressman from Illinois
Bill Weld, 74, former Governor of Massachusetts

Dropped out:
Mark Sanford, 59, former Governor of South Carolina

* To see all the books I read tagged Election 2020 click the link. I got my polling information here: https://projects.fivethirtyeight.com/2020-primaries/democratic/national/

Books about Election Topics of Importance:

Climate Change:
Please drop everything and read: 1) The Uninhabitable Earth: Life After Warming by David Wallace-Wells
2) Green Metropolis by David Owen
3) The Ends of the World by Peter Brannen
4) Unstoppable by Bill Nye

Protecting Democracy:
1) Report on the Investigation into Russian Interference in the 2016 Presidential Election by Robert S. Mueller III 
2) Facts and Fears: Hard Truths from a Life in Intelligence by James R. Clapper
3) How Democracies Die: What History Reveals About Our Future by Steven Levitsky
4) Good and Mad: The Revolutionary Power of Women's Anger by Rebecca Traister
5) The End of Power: From Boardrooms to Battlefields and Churches to States, Why Being In Charge Isn't What It Used to Be by Moisés Naím
6) 21 Lessons for the 21st Century by Yuval Noah Harari

A subset of Protecting Democracy- Campaign Finance/ Financial Abuse/ Income Inequality:
1) Winners Take All: The Elite Charade of Changing the World by Anand Giridharadas
2) Freefall: America, Free Markets, and the Sinking of the World Economy by Joseph E. Stiglitz
3) The Big Short: Inside the Doomsday Machine by Michael Lewis
4) The Trillion Dollar Meltdown: Easy Money, High Rollers, and the Great Credit Crash by Charles R. Morris

American Healthcare:
1) Deadly Spin: An Insurance Company Insider Speaks Out on How Corporate PR Is Killing Health Care and Deceiving Americans by Wendell Potter
2) An American Sickness: How Healthcare Became Big Business and How You Can Take It Back by Elisabeth Rosenthal

Guns: 
1) Fight like a Mother: How a Grassroots Movement Took on the Gun Lobby and Why Women Will Change the World by Shannon Watts
2) Parkland: Birth of a Movement by Dave Cullen
3) American Gun by Chris Kyle

Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed by Meghan Daum

Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed: Sixteen Writers on The Decision Not To Have Kids by Meghan Daum
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

The idea that people who choose not have children are selfish has always been completely preposterous to me. I have two children I completely love and adore, but the reasons I chose to have them were (in my opinion) "selfish, shallow, and self-absorbed" even if the actual raising of them sometimes requires saint-like patience and sacrifice. That is, I desperately wanted my own kids, my own family, little me's to shower with affection. In contrast, I think people who adopt or even those who don't have children, are way less selfish and shallow. Especially since our overpopulated planet is basically on fire now. (Sorry fellow moms, it's not a judgment on you, it's a judgment on myself.) And furthermore, I desperately want my own children to give me grandchildren one day- even at the potential cost to some of their own happiness- how's that for selfish? Additionally, my own mother seemed - quite the opposite of me- a somewhat reluctant mother. So I was very receptive to this collection, and it went beyond the ideas that I already held, enriching my overall view of other people's decisions of whether to have kids or not.

I especially enjoyed "Maternal Instinct" by Laura Kipnis which is a really interesting feminist take on the decision not to have children; "Be Here Now," by Lionel Shriver which highlights some of the racist and cultural motivations in the perpetuating the idea of reproduction in particular countries; "The Most Important Thing" by Sigrid Nunez which explored the time when having children was often a misfortune; "Over and Out" by Geoff Dyer, and “The End” by Tim Kreider. I also noticed a thread of a number of writers who felt unsatisfied with their own childhoods.

Though I noticed that for such highly intellectual and often atheistic arguments, the women in these essays never doubted the importance of the "work they wanted to do." Geoff Dyer touched on this issue a little and Tom Kreisler addressed it more directly: in a nihilistic universe, what value does your work have? Hypothetically, if we are a bunch of bacteria on a rock hurtling through space, then the value of our work probably isn't in any discernible way more significant than any other particular experience including the experience of being a parent. On the other hand, if there's a God (and maybe even if there's not) and an understanding of deep sacrificial love is the greatest earthly value or experience then maybe they're missing the mark? The authors of the essays are all professional writers so they all have work to do which is imbued with spirit in a way that many other people's jobs are not. So maybe the sacred nature of their work particularly skews their view of this issue. But for example, what particular value is Randall L. Stephenson or Michel Combes providing to the world as the CEOs of ATT and Sprint respectively? None that I can think of. But I get it, if it's your heart's passion is to be a CEO, rather than to be a parent, and as a woman, you think that being a parent will get in the way of your CEO dreams, you should do you.

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The Light of the World by Elizabeth Alexander

The Light of the World by Elizabeth Alexander
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

This reminded me a lot of Joan Didion’s The Year of Magical Thinking except I liked it better because I could palpably feel the love and loss of Alexander's husband Ficre. Alexander's writing is wonderful, and to read this book is to understand love on this earth a little better.

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Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Todd Gilbert

Stumbling on Happiness by Daniel Todd Gilbert
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I remember reading an article about this book that made such a big impression on me that I mentioned it to Kevin on our first date in 2006. (We have now been married 10 years.) The article: https://www.nytimes.com/2003/09/07/ma... In fact, I think I said something like, "I don't believe in happiness." I guess I'm lucky he didn't get up and immediately sprint out. Haha. It's definitely interesting though it's been so successful throughout the years that I was aware of many of the studies already.

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Tending Roses by Lisa Wingate

Tending Roses by Lisa Wingate
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

Very heavy-handed with some very preachy cheesy writing but a perfectly pleasant way to pass the time if that's what you're looking for.

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The Maze Runner by James Dashner

The Maze Runner by James Dashner
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

This is obviously not literary but it's also just bad for genre fiction: bad characters, bad plot, things are only somewhat resolved by a series of contrivances, but ultimately not actually solved. Also, if I were aiming to do what the characters are supposedly aiming to do in this book, memory loss would be an awful awful component of said plan.

I will concede that I've read worse actual writing.

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The Honest Truth About Dishonesty by Dan Ariely

The Honest Truth About Dishonesty: How We Lie to Everyone - Especially Ourselves by Dan Ariely
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

On the pro side, some of these influences are important to know about in one's personal life and in legal and policy work. On the con side, this book is pretty repetitive if you've read Ariely's other books as I have. Additionally, though I'm aware that this is all based on studies, the lack of actual moral or spiritual perspective in the book is disappointing. Compare for example Jonathan Haidt's The Happiness Hypothesis or The Righteous Mind.

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Ongoingness by Sarah Manguso

Ongoingness: The End of a Diary by Sarah Manguso
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

I liked this book a lot. It's only a little bit about the author keeping a diary, it's actually about time, and life, death, and motherhood. It conjured up my horror at our our ceaseless march towards not just death but oblivion. I'm a complicated type of Christian that doesn't think the universe owes me eternity, but rather that I owe the universe a lot of sacrifice to others. So to me, as to many others, the oblivion is a real thing that makes it hard to justify the little daily acts, and losing memories- mental or physical- is very much a step towards that oblivion.

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David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants by Malcolm Gladwell

David and Goliath: Underdogs, Misfits, and the Art of Battling Giants by Malcolm Gladwell
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

Amazing first chapter and some interesting ideas that were somewhat supported but overall not a tightly-argued or edited book. First chapter is worth rereading any time you need inspiration.

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The Shallows by Nicholas Carr

The Shallows: What the Internet Is Doing to Our Brains by Nicholas Carr
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

The interesting part of this book for me is that computers and the internet have changed how we think and how we write. I'm in a strange age group in that I both owned a typewriter as a kid and wrote a few grade school reports by hand, but mostly wrote reports for school on computers, and was already teaching myself html in college. I thought the difference that writing by hand, on the typewriter, or on the computer makes on the style of the writing is particularly interesting since Jennifer Egan says that she drafted the first version of all her novels by hand.

The book seemed a bit disorganized for me though. And it felt insufficiently researched or fleshed out especially in the science section.

I think I have a particularly strange perspective because I only began to read in such a large quantity specifically because as someone with no job or car from 2016-2018, I could get free ebooks and audiobooks from my library. I think since then, my transformation as a reader has been akin to a second college education. I've read about 200 books a year since 2016, including this year, for a total of over 800 books in 4 years. Many of those books were some serious literary tomes- such as the Bible and Moby Dick. So it's easy for me to dismiss the overwrought idea that the internet has made me unable to read serious books and concentrate on them when it's precisely the internet that has increased my reading and understanding of the world.

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Doing Justice by Preet Bharara

Doing Justice: A Prosecutor's Thoughts on Crime, Punishment, and the Rule of Law by Preet Bharara
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

It started off slowly but was a very interesting non-political book about the practice of law. I wish I'd read it in law school (though it didn't exist then). My only complaint was that I wish I could unread the chapter about cannibals though I suppose there is some value in grappling with the particular problems sociopaths when applying the law.

“Certain norms do matter. Our adversaries are not our enemies; the law is not a political weapon; objective truths do exist; fair process is essential in civilized society.”― Preet Bharara

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Dollars and Sense by Dan Ariely

Dollars and Sense: How We Misthink Money and How to Spend Smarter by Dan Ariely
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

This is a better book if you haven't already read a ton of behavioral economics. For me, it was a compilation of a lot of effects I'd already read about (for example in Ariely's Predictably Irrational). This book would be great for people who don't know that much about behavioral economics who are interested in personal finance.

I was also uncomfortable with the way the authors veered into territory that was somewhat morality- based without a holistic view of the issue. I fear economics often makes this mistake, but to my mind, behavioral economics is more sophisticated and shouldn't make this error. We've rejected the idea that humans make the most rational economic decisions. We've also learned that morality can be very closely tied to empathy and other emotional systems. So I didn't find the section on "fairness" to very sophisticated with regards to current economics, psychology, biology, or ethics research. Sure, you should pay the locksmith his rate for the reasons stated in this book, but I disagree that you shouldn't battle large companies like Netflix or Uber when they do something you consider unfair- and certainly when they do unethical things.

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